Four years ago today, my daughter was born at 4:02 p.m. It was the most excruciating, painful afternoon of my life. The flip side of the pain is that nothing has impacted my life more than she has. And not the sugary sweet oh-isn’t-being-a-parent-the-greatest-thing-in-the-world Precious Moments feeling. I’m talking about the your-a-mom-now-so-you-better-get-your-shit-together impact.
Here I am four years later and pushing through some more pain. Since living through painful things has always brought me extraordinary experiences–childbirth a shining, unimaginative metaphor for this life lesson–I can only believe that what I’m going through now will deliver a life less ordinary.
Let’s hope, right?
I’m sure I’ll talk more about the painful stuff I’m pushing through at a later date. For now, I want to concentrate on what I plan on gaining:
1.) A Writing Career
One of the life less ordinary experiences I’m looking to find is a writing career. Not just any writing career. I want to spend my days typing away words that will make people laugh out loud, cry until they’re out of Kleenex, and mail copies of my stuff to their dearest friends because they think everyone should read what I wrote. And I want to make a shitload of money doing it.
2.) A Thinner Me
Another extraordinary experience I want is to finally, once and for all, not cringe when I unexpectedly see a reflection of myself in a mirror. I’m not morbidly obese, but I’m definitely not the size I’m meant to be. Ugh weight, weight, weight. Nothing is more soul-sucking, more depressing, or more boring than talking, writing, or obsessing about being overweight. I hate being boring.
3.) A Finished Novel
And finally, I want to FINISH a novel. Yes, this is directly related to my I-want-a-writing-career thing, but it carries it’s own weight on my delicate psyche. I’ve started three separate novels and have yet to finish any of them. And here I am, six months away from 35 (my most middle-of-the-road-age so far to date) and not doing what I want to do most…be a writer.
My plan is to use this blog to keep me accountable to myself. Every day I will write something. Even if it’s one word. Something to keep me on track and committed to my missions: Be the writer you want to be, with the body you want to have, holding the first draft of the book you finished writing in 2008. How better to do this than to…start writing.
I got the best thing of my life on January 15 four years ago. It hurt like hell, but was way worth it. I’m betting on lightening to strike twice. Stranger things have happened in this world. Stranger things have happened in my family…but I’ll save that for another post.
